Tuesday

The Fast Food Wars Are Moving

After a long lapse in coverage the Fast Food Wars are now being continued at the Wackemall News Network--  home of Wackemall News and a division of  Wackemall Mining, Manufacturing, Farming & Transportation... Wackemall.com, Leading no one and going nowhere fast....




All the Fast Food archives as well as the latest coverage of the Fast Food Wars will be found there along with Parking Meter Poetry, Billy's Page 3 Girls, Holidaze and more.

Friday

Doing The McCafe Shuffle

Calling In Flavors

Ronald was busy greenwashing when the King, he walked in,
saying, "What are you going to do? Wendy's in Japan
and now she's number 2.
You promised me, if I played your game
they'd all soon get in line
but things ain't working out that way--
your job is on the line!"

So the two of them, they plotted,
plotted all night through,
planning every little step--
just what they plan to do.
I listened in the best I could,
hoping I could defuse it
but just as things got juicy,
someone turned up the music!

What will the red headed clown and BK do next? How about the McCafe Shuffle?

Wednesday

Fast Food Wars Come To North Carolina

Skipper's Hot Dogs

The King went down to Skipper's Hot Dogs.
Ronald drove the car.
Tired, they pulled in the old drive thru
as they'd traveled very far.
But when the dogs began to bark
Ronald stepped down on the gas
to speed the King far from it all
for fear it'd be their last.


Just a note for those who may not be familiar with my telling of the Fast Food Wars, or the chain of one that is Skipper's Hot Dogs located on East Market Street in Greensboro, NC. As you pull into the drive thru at Skipper's (Formerly Skip's) you are greeted with the recorded sounds of a barking dog on the drive thru speakers before a human takes your order. But as tacky as it may seem and as poor as the building might appear when compared to national chains, Skipper's Hot Dogs are among the best you'll ever taste and just as deadly.

Tuesday

I Didn't Understand A Word She Said

Mandarin Chicken

A Mandarin chicken clucked in Chinese,
said, “For just a Frosty
I’ll do anything you please,”
but Wendy, hot and juicy,
couldn’t understand a word
and served-up fresh chili
to the funny talking bird.


And so it is, another fast food delight, lunch with a poet and his pen is enough to drive even the poet mad. But then, war is always maddening.

Hot, Fast Food Sponsors!

Say hello to Billy's Page 3 Girls and Santa's Reindeer Tales, the newest sponsors of the Fast Food Wars, made possible by sweet tasty goodness that knows no moral bounds. Yeah, I know that's a contradiction in terms but war is screwed-up like that.

If you'd like to sponsor the war... Well, that was the link-- use it.

Tender Bites?

Mandarin Chicken

A Mandarin chicken clucked in Chinese,
said, “For just a Frosty
I’ll do anything you please,”
but Wendy, hot and juicy,
couldn’t understand a word
and served-up fresh chili
to the funny talking bird.

This has been another of my Fast Food Poems always served frozen, never fresh but always on time.

I Decided To Wackemall

"Think Outside The Bun"

The Fiesta Platters rocked the Bell
as Taco sang the lead.
Ronald shouted, "He's illegal!!
He's a different breed!"
Gordida, he was playing bass--
a hot-n-spicy Salsa riff.
And the songs they played, a tribute
to the long since fallen, Biff.

The King, he waited down the street,
always looking towards the border
and with every scream his subjects cried
he shouted, "Out of order!"
And though he hated Taco so,
he'd been forced to let him cross
fearing the day he knew would come
when Taco, he'd be boss.

Tetley waited at the bar
with her very own sweet tea
while burritos catered her every whim
waiting on their bended knees.
The Dairy Queen was heard to scream,
"Why won't they wait on me?"
The Fiesta Platters rocked the Bell
as Taco sang the lead.


This, the 71st dispatch of Fast Food Delights, the story of the Fast Food Wars, has been brought to you by Wackemall.